QOTD (Computer Geeks Only)

The road to Perl is paved with syntax extensions.

Daniel Dittmar in comp.lang.python

One Last Disneyland Anecdote

Jean and Kelly were in a souvenir store on the hotel premises when I came down from the room to join them. We talked about going to Goofy's Kitchen for the character breakfast, and I offered to go there and try to get reservations. Jean asked Kelly "do you want to go with Dad or stay with me?" Kelly answered "stay with you." Why not? The store had all those cool tchatckas.

So I began my walk, expecting to place a reservation and then wait in the lobby of the restaurant for Jean and Kelly to join me. Not ten seconds after I left the store, Kelly is tugging on my shirt. "Oh, you decided to come with me after all?" "Uh huh." Now this is the measure of where I fail as a parent. I didn't even think to ask Kelly if she'd let her mom know that she was coming with me. I didn't assume she told Jean, it just plain didn't occur to me. So we went off to find the restaurant.

I got the reservations, and I was looking to see if Jean had found the restaurant when she came in with a Disney Security officer in tow. Kelly had not told Mom anything, but just dashed out the door after me at the last instant. Jean was paying for something and didn't catch her departure in that fatal instant. Probably moments after Kelly shot out the door, Jean became aware she was not there and began to look for her. Things escalated and Jean began living the nightmare that Kelly might have been snatched, hoping for the lesser nightmare that Kelly had merely wandered off and become lost.

The happy ending is that of course we were reunited, after Jean lost a few years to fear. And Kelly and I added some safety rules to our repetoire, i.e. always make sure each parent knows where Kelly is before taking off.

Being a true geek, I also offered a technical fix for human frailty: "if we'd had a pair of Family Radio Service handhelds, you'd have been able to ask me if Kelly was with me as soon as you missed her, and not had to worry." So before the next trip, we'll be buying a pair of FRSs (possibly three, so I can take one to Anime Expo, while Jean and Kelly both have their own units).

More Disneyland Musings

The positive side of Disneyland for Kelly is of course the Fantasy: the breakfast with Disney characters at Goofy's Kitchen, the dinner with more Disney characters at Avalon Cove, the rides like Dumbo and King Triton's Carousel and the Orange Stinger.

The positive side for me, where it exists, is in what I've been calling social engineering. This is all the infrastructure and activities designed to keep crowds of people moving, satisfied, cheerful. In long lines, there is often some visual distraction to pass the time, a 'side-story' for the ride playing on monitors, animatronic tableau, a view of other rides, whatever. Often, the line is broken up into 'outside' and 'inside' so you don't have to see the line stretching unbroken into the distance.

In parades there are clear breaks between attractions so that pedestrians can cross the street without waiting for the entire parade to pass by. One parade I witnessed at Paradise Pier in the California Adventure illustrates some of the continuous, subtle application of technology in the aid of this social engineering. This parade was composed of several segments with varying musical themes. There was classical Chinese, American Pop, jazz and so on.

As each 'themed' part of the parade passed by, it's musical accompaniment swelled to fill the air, displacing the last. Each of these musical themes seemed to have the same metre as the last, and the blending was seamless. I found out later from a 'cast member' that each float at the center of a themed section of the parade carries a radio transmitter. The transmitter sends a signal to the speakers which line the parade route. As the signal from the transmitter gets stronger, it overrides the signal from an earlier float, and the music for that float begins to dominate the speakers at that particular location. Supercool!

Still, I'm a curmudgeon, and observing the subtle and unsubtle applications of social engineering lasts one only so long. Our trip ended none too soon for me. All the standing in line and walking at one-third speed with the random shuffle surrounded by milling crowds takes it's toll on my back. Jean asked Kelly if we should stay longer next time, and Kelly said yes. I told her that one more day would have seen me lying on the hotel bed with a heating pad in the small of my back.

While I made time for myself to try out some of the 'grown-up' rides, I guess I'm just not into amusement parks any more. I rode the faux Coney Island roller coaster, California Screamin', and while I got satisfactorily jostled and disoriented, it was pretty much, "so what?" While others were screaming and flailing their hands, I was just sitting quietly with a small smile on my face. I guess it's pretty much a 'make your own fun' sort of thing.

I rode Space Mountain, mainly to see if I thought Kelly would like it. I don't think she's ready for careening through nearly pitch black spaces in an invisible roller coaster, so I didn't suggest it. My reaction was the same ho-hum attitude. Star Tours was amusing, but more for what a ride simulator can do than for the actual attraction.

So Jean is talking about this being a yearly event and I'm replying "it doesn't have to be every year, surely?" In any case, the scenario we talked about last year but didn't do now seems likely: Jean and Kelly ride down to John Wayne Airport with me when I go to Anime Expo next year, and they take the shuttle to Anaheim, while I take the shuttle to Long Beach. At the end of AX, instead of taking the shuttle back to the airport, I take one to Anaheim and join them for a day or two at Disneyland before we all fly back together. That way, Kelly gets several days at Disneyland (Anime Expo is a four day convention) and I get spared burning out on Disney before she does.

Tobacco

I've been reading about how Dave Winer nearly had a heart attack recently, ending up in the hospital for a short stay. The diagnosis is that it was apparently aggravated by heavy smoking. So now he's grappling with quitting. Most interesting to me is that I've been reading his weblog for several years now (despite the fact that he's an opinionated and hypocritical egotist a lot of the time), and he's never once let slip that he smokes. I don't think he was concealing things, I just think that he took it for granted, like breathing. And now he doesn't.

I smoked for several years when I was young and immortal. I attempted to quit once while in college (exactly where I started) and failed. When I met Jean I decided to quit for real. I started by switching to low-tar cigarettes, then lower still. Then I rationed myself to x cigarettes per day, gradually reducing the number x. Finally the day came when I was down to my final pack. The entire process took several weeks. That day, I made sure I wasn't working or doing anything stressful. I don't remember what I did do. Probably went to a movie.

I was braced for terrible cravings, a vulture perched on my shoulder. But it never arrived. I'm sorry to tell all the other ex-smokers out there, but quitting was easy. While awake, I never experienced a craving. When sleeping, I would occasionally have a dream where I inadvertently lit up a cigarette, and thought "Oh damn. Now I'll have to start all over again." Then I'd wake up and realize I hadn't smoked after all, and feel relieved. So I guess I only needed a smoke when it couldn't hurt me.

And now I have a kid, and I'm glad I'm not oh-so-unthinkingly subjecting her to second-hand smoke. You could say I'm exposing her to second-hand health.

How To Murder Your GBA (Without Really Trying)

I've just installed a gallery of my stumbling efforts installing an Afterburner into my Gameboy Advance. All the pictures are of me or my GBA, since Tom had the only camera. Silly me, I forgot to bring mine, so thanks Tom.

Despite the dust stuck in between layers of LCDs, antireflective film, etc., this was a very good addition. I took the GBA with me on the plane flight, and on the way down finally got to a save point in Castlevania, Circle of the Moon. In fact, I levelled up to level 8, and saw several rooms in the castle. At least until I got chomped by the floating mummy dancer thingies.

Idle moments at Disneyland were also spent tinkering with Advance Wars, which isn't nearly as dark as Castlevania, but still looked quite good with a frontlight. So I'd say the darn thing was a success indeed!

21st of June vs. 4th of July

I think I can be excused from fireworks events this year, since the fireworks at Disneyland our last night out were bigger and more spectacular than any I'm likely to see locally. Kelly was just about shrieking, jumping up and down, clapping and generally wigging out while it was going on. She had just finished her final ride on the Dumbo rockets, and we were fortuitously in just the right place for a grand view of the light show. Moreover, we were in a great location to see Tinkerbell scooting through the air from the Matterhorn to who-knows-where over the trees:

Disney has arielists, both male and female, playing Tinkerbell. Tinkerbell slides down the wire from the Matterhorn to behind the Village Haus restaurant. Tinkerbell is caught at the end of her zip line by two guys with mattresses. Cast Members enjoy watching Tinkerbell crash into an old bed mattress in the landing area, an elevated platform behind the Village Haus restaurant.

Fun Facts of Disneyland's Matterhorn, #14

This last citation is amusing because it is from a collection of 'reports' on 'facts' about Disneyland. The section on Tinkerbell and the Matterhorn is filled with contradictory tidbits, but the essentials are correct. It was definitely fun to watch Kelly react to the flying Tinkerbell.

<em>Too</em> Soft

Funny how the little things can have such an impact. One of the things I found most bothersome in Anaheim (and indeed I've noticed this whenever I've gone to Anime Expo, now moved to Long Beach) is the water. Tualatin water is a trifle hard, I think, but I've grown used to it. The water in Anaheim may be processed or just naturally soft. Whatever.

The problem is that I've grown used to the qualities of Oregon water, and whenever I travel to that land to the south, the water seems strange. Alien. A glass of water just doesn't seem to satisfy my thirst. It seems tainted somehow.

So I'm thankful to be back home drinking the water I'm used to. I suppose that if I had to move to California (heavens forfend), I'd be used to the water in six months or so, but let's not do that experiment, okay?